I decided to hop online and go to match.com and review several profiles of men, just to see what other men are saying & doing in their profiles, since I’m currently coaching a man who’s had no luck with personal sites in the past.

Introduce Yourself to Her With These WordsWell, I took a look at about 5 profiles, from men… which is something I occasionally like to do, and over the past 10 years of doing so, I’ve noticed changing patterns & trends.

One of the first I opened was from a “goofy guy“. I say “goofy guy” because that’s exactly how he described himself, in his subject line and throughout his profile. In another profile I read, a man also described himself as “goofy” though he didn’t emphasize it as much as the first profile.

I really feel that it’s a mistake for a man to refer to himself as goofy– especially online where he’s trying to meet women who have never had any face time with him.

When a woman hears “goofy” she tends to think… flaky, dopey, weird, screwy, irresponsible, nutty and possibly even childish. Of course, these are NOT things a woman is attracted to. A “screwy, irresponsible, child” is simply NOT a sexy dynamic… it doesn’t paint a pretty picture in her mind.

However, as we’ve discussed, an attractive quality in a man, is being comical and the confidence to entertain, tell funny stories, convey humorous jokes and a man who compels attention and women:

The type of man that her friends will be envious of.

What type of adjectives describe this man?

Captivating

Inspiring

Provocative

Pleasurable

Poignant

Enthralling

Enchanting

Impressive

Stimulating

Witty

Striking

Piquant

Clever

These are words that paint a much prettier picture in a woman’s mind. She is now envisioning a man that is educated and mentally stable, who’s interesting and can have a good time. She’ll be happy to take him home to meet her parents. She won’t have to worry about him doing something embarrassing on a date, or embarrassing her in front of her friends. She’s likely to have a good time with him.


Shelley McMurtry headshotBy John’s Special Guest: Shelley McMurtry
After working in the high-tech sector and having a marketing research company, Shelley McMurtry started down an entirely new career path. Filled with stories from her own dating life being a single, career minded, successful businesswoman, who was tired of dating men who were intimidated by her successes and drive, she entered the attraction and dating market for men.

She founded “First In Her Mind .com” in 2004 with the desire to help men recognize and be able to keep a quality woman in their life, and develop their confidence, identity, and sense of security so they wouldn’t make some of the most classic mistakes she had seen men make. She tells the stories from her own life, and from the lives of friends and relatives, through her articles written specifically for men. She’s known for being sarcastic, direct, as well as controversial at times. Through the years loyal readers have followed Shelley as she has dated, utilized observational humor of the things she witnesses men doing, and has told some outrageous stories that could only be true.