Why do people eat at McDonald’s on a consistent basis when they know it is unhealthy?
Why do people smoke cigarettes knowing they are drastically increasing their risk of all kinds of deadly diseases?
Why do people drink beer to excess knowing they will have a horrible hangover the next day?
And why do married, powerful men hire hookers when they know the consequences of getting caught can be the destruction of their careers?
The answer to each one of these is simple: because it feels good in the moment. McDonald’s tastes good in the moment, cigarettes feel good in the moment, beer gives you a pleasant buzz in the moment, and hookers make them feel good in the moment in a way wives can’t or won’t.
There’s rarely any great emotional angst behind these decisions, despite what TV psychoanalysts would have you believe. Frank Gifford didn’t cheat on Kathy Lee because of some deep seated, long ago resentment for his mother—he did it because a pair of 42 DD’s was waved in his face, and 42 DD feel good. Really good.
Why do women go after bad boys and dysfunctional guys?
Now, a lot of the stuff I just mentioned can have long term consequences, and it is not out of the realm of possibility to use self imposed discipline to avoid these things.
However, it is important to understand that people make decisions in the moment and for the long term simply because someone or something made them feel it (the whole marriage industry is based on this). So, what you want to do is be the guy who makes people, especially women, feel good in the moment.
If you’re the guy who makes people laugh, always has a funny story to tell, you’re genuinely interested in them, and you’ve mastered behavior that makes women feel chemistry, people will want to be around you.
When people want to be around you, good things come your way. More people want to hang around you, and the right people can bring you opportunity, and are happy to if you make them feel good.
When you make women feel good, you’re always their first choice because so many men make so many women feel so bad. Don’t overcomplicate this very important aspect of persuasion and influence: make people feel good in the moment, and they’ll make good decisions regarding you.
By Your Host: John Alanis
John Alanis has been teaching men how to attract the women they really want since 2004, even getting them to approach you first, no matter your looks, age or income. John not only teaches the skill of initial attraction, he also teaches the skill of sustaining attraction so men can continue the relationships they form with women. After all, it is no good to meet lots of women if they won’t stick around.
John is most certainly not a part of the “pick up artist crowd,” instead teaching men how to make themselves “naturally attractive” by suppressing unattractive behaviors and amplifying attractive ones, making yourself attractive without changing “who you are.” John served in the US Navy’s submarine force in the early 90’s, worked in the oilfields of Alaska and has been running his own business since 1995. The theme of “mental toughness” and “how to be a real man in an age of girlie men” runs through is writings and teachings. While not for the faint of heart or weak of mind, John’s teachings do get results, and he has many happy subscribers and customers.